Sickness

A house full of people barfing, physically exhausted, headaches, body aches, sore stomaches...this has been us for the past 24 hours. Sickness of the physical body. It is hard to take sometimes. It is painful, tiring, depressing, you all of a sudden become this lazy person who has no desire to lift a finger for anything or anyone because you feel so awlful, yet you have no choice. You have seven kids to take care of no matter how ill you might be. No help from nearby friends or family, it's just you and your husband who is most likely at work for 8 hours that day. You have no choice but to suck it up and get the job done. That goes for our spiritual sickness as well. Sometimes we are so spiritually exhausted, depressed, full of unbelief and have become so lazy we don't even want to utter one more word up in prayer. We have become so utterly lazy that our souls are suffering for it. The sad thing is, is that it effects not only us but everyone around us. We all become "sick" because of it. But really it is up to us to suck it up and get over it. No one is going to force us to pray. It is ultimately between us and the Lord. He is the Great Physician whether it be physical or spiritual. There is only One Healer-Jesus.

There is Hope

I am going to hit the hay in about 5 minutes and when I do I am going to cry out to Jesus tonight for some hope. That He would set before us some hope in out current financial difficulties. And our current state of aloneness as well. It has been a hard road Lenny and I have had to travel the past 16 years. No respect from family and little from friends. No money. Not too many invites or pop ins. No one seems to care. I just hope that this can all be for our kids. That we will have paved the way for them and they would never have to experience rejection or difficulties we have. It has been so hard. I mean so hard. But I have to come back and find my hope in the Lord. That this week will count. It will bring me back to a hope in the one who is able. Belief...in the Jesus who is real. I need Him to fill my cup tonight. To let it flow with living waters, refreshing waters. Oh God, I need a touch from you, Lord. I need peace and rest tonight that only you can give. You alone are my source.
I love you, Jesus!