new stuff

I am so thankful to be typing on my new laptop I got from my husband the other night :) and to be hearing the sound of my new(to us) dryer drying our clothes in the background. It has been a few months since we have both washed and dried our own clothes here at the house. One wasn't working, then the other one died...one week of no laundry for 9 people ends up being quiet a lot of laundry. I already did three loads and haven't even made a dent yet. I was able to take my girls out shopping today at the mall, it was fun. Rarely do we end up getting new clothes(usually they are hand me downs or from a thrift store) so it was a treat to be able to splurge a little. Next week we should be getting our new(to us) big 15 passenger van. So far I haven't seen it but my husband assures me I will love it. I am invisioning glorious rides to the grocery store, co-op, to church and to my parents...with everyone in their own space and buckled in their own seat! Yeah!!! I can't wait, and neither can the kids. Praise the Lord for new(to us)things...He makes all things new! Even for those who can't afford it!

Birthdays

My only sister turned 40 on Saturday and I went home to help celebrate with four of the kids. It was a fun night of getting together and celebrating but I also listened a lot. I listened to my sister and her friend talk about their busy lives and big paying jobs as HR Manager(sister) and advertiving(her freind). I listened to what my mom, aunt, brother-in-law and two nephews had to say about her when she opened her gifts. They all wrote something down and read it out loud. And as I sat back and listened I couldn't help but ponder what on earth people would say about me when I turned 40(in three years!) I actually said that to my dad as we were standing there quietly and he said, "The question is how many kids will you have by the time your 40?" Was that a slam? Maybe....I think they just have no idea how to take me. I have blood bonds with these people but many are unsaved and I live in a different universe then they do, just the same planet. Jesus is not their guiding force. He is not the reason they live and breath. Many of them are materialistic and live for more money, big houses, nice things, cars, etc. Where my husband and I are living for the exact opposite. We are doing our best to live for the glory of Jesus. He is what we are after. We love Him and desire to be better people through His unfathomable grace if He allows us. To be changed by Him and for Him. I could most likely imagine what my husband would say to me when I turn 40(the kind of stuff he says everyday to me) and maybe guess what my kids would say, although that might be a little scary. But what about my family....what will they say? Will they see the Jesus in me? Will they be able to acknowlege the One who I desire? And if they do will they want what I have? Is He enough for them? I don't know. The Lord will have to take care of that one. Or will they they see my seven or who knows, maybe eight, and look down upon us and wonder what in the heck we were thinking? Let me tell you, God knows what were thinking. He knows this is all about Him and for Him and He has blessed us beyond everything sensible to my husband and I. Never in a million years would I have inagined my life as it is. Yes, married with kids. But not this many and definately not homeschooling this long(For goodness sakes, I barely graduated High School!). It by by the sheer grace of God that my life "works" and functions on a daily basis. He is my desire and I long to ever be in His presence and find fellowship with Him.

Who needs sleep

...lack of sleep...that has been my motto the last two days thanks to my four month old, Gideon. Don't get me wrong, he's a cutie and I love him deeply but he hasn't allowed me to get much sleep the last few nights. Then I got to thinking aren't I thankful the Lord doesn't get tired(or sick-like I am feeling). We can call on Him day and night no matter what time zone, where we are in the universe, and He will always be there to listen. He doesn't get crabby because He doesn't feel good or His patience doesn't run low because He wants to be left alone and wish everyone would just stop arguing for five minutes! He is a constant...always there, always loving, always working out the good for us, always compassionate, always faithful, always ready to forgive...for this I am forever thankful and filled with gratitude.

My First Entry

To be honest, I am not sure how long I will be able to keep this up but I am going to give it a whirl. I am so excited to be a part of so many great bible studies and groups. I am anxious to be a part of the So Long, Insecurity group on the LPM blog. Lordwilling I can keep up with all my little bambinos running around and throughout our school days. Sometimes I wonder how I do it-how on earth God has allowed me to be so blessed. I feel so unworthy and fail constantly but He continues to be faithful and see me through day in and day out. I think my goal of this blog will be somewhat of an online journal. My days are usually littered with a bit of chaos and a ton of grace. I am nothing worthy of modeling after it is sheer grace that I run on, I would be completely lost without it.